drunker jokes New 2017

A DOCTOR advised Pappu who was a heavy drunker, ‘Pappu, whenever the urge to drink overtakes you, say to yourself — I will not drink, I will not drink, I will not drink….’
‘That won’t help, Doctor,’ replied Pappu, because I always lie to myself.
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Once Pappu goes to a chandni beer bar….to drink and watch cabre dance..
His mom gets angry & asks him: Did you see anything there that u were not supposed to see?
Pappu: Yes mom, I saw dad there!

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Husband Shayrana Andaz Mein: Jab Hum Peete They Tab Itni Pee Ki Mehkhaney Tak Ujad Gaye…. Aaj Jab Tumne Aankho Se Pilayi Hai Toh Humne Peena Chod Diya…
Wife (Gusse Se): Jyada Maska Mat Lagao Samjhe, Mujhe Pata Hai Aaj Dry Day Hai…
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Sharabi knocks d door
His wife open d door
Sarabi- Who r u?
Wife- aila! Mujkohi bhul gaye.
Sarabi- Sarabi Nasha har gam ko bhula deta he BEHAN :D
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A drunk on his way home from a bar one night realizes that he has dropped his keys. He gets down on his hands and knees and starts groping around beneath a lamppost. A policeman asks what he’s doing.
“I lost my keys in the park,” says the drunk.
“Then why are you looking for them under the lamppost?” asks the puzzled cop.
“Because,” says the drunk, “that’s where the light is.”
This entry was posted on February 4, 2013, in Drunker Jokes.
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RESULT AGAR ACHCHA HO:
Maa – Bhagwan ki kripa hai.
Papa – Beta Kiska Hai.
Dost – Chal Daaru Peete hain.

RESULT AGAR BURA HO:
Maa – Aag lage is mobile mein.
Papa – Laad pyar ne bigaad diya.
Dost – Chal Daaru Peete hain.

BIRTHDAY PAR:
Maa – Jug jug jiye mera beta.
Papa – Hamesha aage badhe.
Dost – Chal Daaru Peete hain.

LOVE MEIN FAIL HONE PAR:
Maa – Beta Bhool ja usko.
Papa – Mard ban.
Dost – Chal Daaru Peete hain.

Moral : Friends never change.
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Sharabi:-Doctor ji kya aap meri sharab chuuda sakte hain?
Doctor:- haan haan ,kyon nahin.
Sharabi:- police ne meri 500 botel sharab ki pakad li hain ,jaldi se unhe chhudwa lijiye
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Sharabi Hawa mein COIN Uchaalkar Bola:
Head Aaya To WISKHEY,
Tail Aaya To Vodka
Coin Zameen per Khada raha to RUM,
Aur
Coin Hawa mein raha to DARU BAND
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3 Piyakkar ne Daru pee ke Ek Taxi Roki….Taxi Driver ne Gaddi Start ki and Fir Band kar di…Bola yeh Lo Saab hum pahunch gaye
1st Piyakkar ne Use Paise De diye
2nd Piyakkar Bola…Thank You
3rd Piakkar ne ek Thappad Diya n Bola “Aaram se chalaya kar…marwa deta aaj to

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#Two drunken men are talking#
#Man 1: I am planning to buy the world#
#Man 2: You can’t#
#Man 1: Why###
#Man 2: I am not going to sell it#
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##Police arrested a drunkard & askd: Where r u going##
#Man: I’m going 2 attend a lecture on ill effects of drinking.
#Cop: Who’ll lecture at midnight ?
#Man: My wife…

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