Sunday, 11 December 2016

Funny SMS That Are More Funny Than Kapil Sharma


  1. ⧭आपकी चाल मोर जेसी
  2. ⧭आवाज़ कोयल जैसी
  3. ⧭दिमाग़ लोमड़ी जेसा
  4. ⧭घुस्सा शेर जैसा
  5. ⧭आँखे हिरण जैसी
  6. ⧭कितना अच्छा होता अगर
  7. ⧭कुछ आदते इंसानो जेसी भी होती


  8. ♥"मुझे सब मंजूर हे, मगर तुम मुझे सॅलरी 1 लाख, 1 फ्लॅट और 1 ब्मो कार चाहिए
  9. "हम आपको 2 लाख रुपये, 2 फ्लॅट और 2 कार देंगे"
  10. ".....क्यू मज़ाक करते हो"
  11. "शुरुआत तो आपने ही की...."



  12. ♥मे उस सामने वाली इमारत पर बिना हाफे चॅड सकता हू
  13. नही चॅड सकते
  14. अच्छा- अगर चॅड जाउ तो क्या दोगे?
  15. धक्का|


  16. ♥नमस्कार ! आज का तापमान 44 दगरी होने की संभावना हे, कृपया अपने दिमाग़ वाली जगह पर बर्फ लगाके रखे क्यूकी भूस्सा बहुत जल्दी आग पकड़ता हे


  17. ♥संतु- तुम आज डॉक्टर के पास क्यू नही गये
  18. बॅंटू- तबीयत ठीक नही लग र्ही थी इसलिए नही गया


  19. ♥तुम मेरे अच्छे दोस्त हो
  20. पेर तुम मेरी पीठ पिकचे क्यो बाते करते हो
  21. तुम मुझसे फ्रॅंक्ली कयोई नही कहते
  22. क्यो दूसरो से कहते हो की मैं हू
  23. ब्रोन जीनियस


  24. ♥जब भी तुम्हे देखता हू मुझे नंदलाल की याद आती हैं
  25. लेकिन मुझ में और नंदलाल में तो कोई समानता नही हैं
  26. हैं क्यो नही, उसने भी तो मुझसे हज़ार रुपीज़ उधार ले रखे हैं





  27. द्रोणाचर्या ने एकलव्या से अंगूठा क्यू माँगा था
  28. ताकि वो कभीSMS करके परेशन ना करे








  29. ♥क्या तुम्हारे पति अब भी तुम्हे काटते हैं
  30. नही
  31. अच्छा ! तो उनकी यॅ आदत छूट्ट ही गयी
  32. नही ! दरअसल उनके दाँत टूट गये



  33. ♥एक दिन ये मौसम बदल जाएगा
  34. तुम्हारा mobile जेब से गिर जाएगा
  35. फिर बचना तुम SMS के पैसे
  36. तुम्हारी करनी का फल तुम्हे मिल जाएगा


  37. ♥कल खाए सो आज खा, आज खाए सो अब !
  38. मुर्गे महँगे हो रहे,फिर खाएगा कब

  39. ♥हूँ मे डॉक्टर जहा,
  40. मेरी बीवी हे नर्स व्हा
  41. हाए ! ये केसा ज़ुल्म सहना पड़ रहा हे
  42. मुझे अपनी बीवी की
  43. sister कहना पड़ रा हे.

  44. Why were males created before females?
  45. because you always need a rough draft before the final copy.

  46. ♥Kareena : will you still love me when my hairs turned grey?
  47. Saif : i sure will...I do not see why not ! after all i have loved you when it was red, yellow, brown, black, silver and orange.

  48. ♥height of patriotism:
  49. " you are sitting on an English toilet in Indian style.

  50. ♥Heaven is : when you have a German car, american salary, Chinese food and Indian wife.
  51. Hell is : when the car is Chinese, food is German, wife is american and salary Indian.


  52. ♥Q.Do you know the difference between stress and tension?
  53. A.stress is when your wife is pregnant. tension is when your secretary is pregnant.

  54. ♥Husband to Wife : do you know the meaning of wife.... it means .....without information fighting every time.
  55. Wife (on hearing this) : it could also mean with idiot for ever.


  56. ♥Bhola finished his exam and came out.
  57. his friends asked him how he did his exam.
  58. Bhola : exam was okay, but for the past tense of THINK , i thought , thought and thought....and at last i wrote THUNK !!!!


  59. ♥He : please darling, whisper those three little words that make walk on air.
  60. SHE : Go hang yourself.


  61. ♥Judge : anything you say in this court will be held against you.
  62. Prisoner: kareena kapoor

  63. ♥SHE : "How do you like my new dress"
  64. HE : "It is very sexy and now, lets drop the subject."

  65. ♥Summer resort:
  66. A place where girls try to get husbands, and husband try to get girls.

  67. ajnabi galiyo se hum gujra nahi karte
  68. Darde dil liya aur diya nahi karte
  69. ye dosti ka rishta sirf aapse he
  70. varna itne SMS hum aur kisi ko kiya nahi karte


  71. ♥Dur se dekha to sher khada tha
  72. Dur se dekha to sher khada tha
  73. Dur se dekha to sher khada tha
  74. Me paas gaya hi nahi....


  75. ♥Manjil ki taraf badte raho
  76. jo dil kahe usi raah ko chunte raho
  77. piche wale ko aage naa jane do
  78. aur jo aage he unse aage niklo
  79. tabhi ek acche truck driver banoge


  80. ♥Dir se dekha to baarish ho rahi thi
  81. Dir se dekha to baarish ho rahi thi
  82. Paas jakar dekha to bheeg gaya


  83. ♥Kaash tumhare chehre per chicken-pox ke daag hote
  84. Kaash tumhare chehre per chicken-pox ke daag hote
  85. Chand to tum ho hi, sitaare bhi saath hote


  86. ♥Aaj aasman me taare aise chamak rahe he
  87. Aaj aasman me taare aise chamak rahe he
  88. Jese hal chamak rahe the


  89. ♥Hi,
  90. Musharraf needs 500 donkey to attack on inida
  91. 499 mil chuke, message milte hi niklo

  92. ♥Arg kiya he
  93. i am a dog and u r a flower
  94. gauur farmaiega
  95. i am a dog and u r a flower
  96. so let me lift my leg and give u a shower


  97. ♥door se dekha to kuch dikha hi nahi
  98. ⇶door se dekha to kuch dikha hi nahi
  99. ⇭paas jakar dekha to kuch tha hi nahi



  100. ♥Gum woh cheez he 
  101. Waah...kya durd he
  102. gum woh cheez he
  103. jisse paper chipkaya jata he


  104. ♥Teacher: gandhiji ke hardwork se hume 15 august ko kya mila
  105. student:chutti

  106. ♥kabhi kabhi mere dil me khyaal aata he
  107. kabhi kabhi mere dil me khyaal aata he
  108. ki kyo kabhi kabhi mere dil me khyaal aata he

  109. ♥Pahla dost : mere paas bunglow he,gaadi he, bank locker he, kya he tumhare paas
  110. Dusra dost: Mere paas in sabki chaabi he
  111. If U R in love with two people at the sMe time. Choose the second person boz if U hve loved the 1st 1 who wouldn’t fallen 4 the 2nd 1 anyway.

  112. If U want 1 2 do the dishes,
  113. Nd, 2 mow the lawn,
  114. U can search 4 the person,
  115. Whn I M g1.

  116. Falling in love is easy as long as U find some1 2 catch U.

  117. True love is like a ghost. Whn every1 speaks about it bt n1 has found it yet.

  118. Always aim 4 the moon. Even if U don’t get it U’ll fall Mongst starts.

  119. The irony of marriage is women want men 2 change after marriage nd men hope tht women will 9t change. As a result, both R disappointed.

  120. U’ll know tht U R in love whn U think tht U hve got the most beautiful woman nd U’ll know tht U’re out of it whn the sMe woman will become ugly.

  121. Similarity between good wine nd love is tht both mature with age.

  122. Falling in nd out of love is easy whn U R Ung. As U grow old, falling in becomes harder nd falling out gets hardest.

  123. Wht is recession?
  124. Whn ‘wine’ nd ‘women’ get replaced by ‘water’ nd ‘wife’ tht critical phase of life is called recession.

  125. A man who can laugh at the face of a difficulty is the 1 who has found some1 2 blMe it on.

  126. I don’t say tht I M always right bt thn I’m nver wrong.

  127. Why do the wedding pho2s always hve the bride on the left side of the groom? Boz in a balance sheet liability is always menti1d in the left column nd assets R menti1d in the right.

  128. Can I say tht I M working hard if I stR at the moni2r of my computer blankly all day long?

  129. It’s better 2 say 9thing nd be called a fool thn opening Ur mouth 2 remove all doubts.

  130. A Chinese proverb says tht talking once 2 a genius is like reading books of knowledge 4 a month. So, feel free 2 call me anytime.

  131. Hndsome
  132. Cute
  133. Loving
  134. Smart
  135. Spirited
  136. Intelligent
  137. Well, enough of me. Wht about U?

  138. Make a day with a laugh. Send funny messages 2 friends 2 give thm the reward of laughter. Explore the funny side of Urs nd get creative. Make the world a better place 2 live with funny messages.

  139. Funny Love SMS

  140. Heres a little hug 4 U 2 make U smile whn Ure blue, 2 make U happy if Ure sad, 2 let U know life aint so bad!


  141. Nobody’s right till somebody’s wrong;
  142. Nobody’s weak till somebody’s strong;
  143. Nobody’s lucky till luv comes along;
  144. Nobody’s l1ly till somebody’s g1.


  145. In my life I learned how 2 love 2 smile 2 be happy 2 be strong 2 work hard 2 be h1st 2 be faithful 2 4give bt I couldn't learn how.. 2 s2p remembering U.


  146. ###The strong becMe weak.. the genius bcMe stupid.. The brave bcMe a coward.. it happens boz of 1 thing, they fall in love###


  147. ###If a smile could be a rain drop i ###would wish tht it keeps raining throughout Ur life so tht thr may be no place 4 tears in Ur life###


  148. ###If u open my heart, guess wht u R gonna see? It's u. True loves R hard 2 find so i kept u.


  149. ###Love is the gross exaggeration of the difference between 1 person & every1 else.


  150. ##If u open my heart, guess wht U R ###gonna see? It's U. True loves R hard 2 find so I kept U.


  151. ###Whn I first saw U, U caught my eye. ###U had a glowed in Ur eye tht no othr Guy had. I asked myself could U be the 1, the 1 make me smile nd feel good inside.


  152. ###Love is like a 4est where brave tigers R killed by the beautiful eyes of deers.

No comments :